It’s funny how we grow older yet are afraid of the changes we go through. We move from school, tertiary, work environments yet still want to hold on to what’s familiar – friends. As we grow taller and older we move away from brightly coloured floral clothing to more classic neutral clothing and find our fashion sense. We move from pigtails to elegant hairstyles. We move out of certain neighbourhoods/ schools and work environments. We change careers and relationships when we outgrow them. However we are too scared to change friends.
We want to drag our “childhood” friends with us throughout our lives. These may be friends we no longer have anything in common with. You have grown into two different people, yet you still want to hold on to friendships that tax you. All because we don’t want people to say “we have changed.” What is wrong with change? We move from one relationship to another when we no longer bring out the best in each other. Why do we feel the sense of loyalty? These are some of the reasons we hold onto these friendships are:
- Fear – anxieties about the future, fear of change – better the devil you know
- Care about what people think of you – not wanting people to think you have changed. HELLO! We have changed, what’s wrong with that? People will always have a certain perception of us regardless whether we encourage it or not
- They know me (secrets, warts and all…) – they’ve seen me come undone
It’s difficult ending a relationship or parting ways. Continuously we evolve and cannot drag with us taxing relationships, friendships or relations. Break ups don’t only happen in relationships, they also happen all around us with families, friends, colleagues or neighbours etc. The person I have become can no longer tolerate taxing friendships
